What it means
A classic, fairly mild insult for an idiot or someone acting daft, clumsy, or brainless in the moment. It’s often more eye-roll than hatred, the sort of thing you call a mate when they’ve just done something spectacularly stupid. Feels very everyday British, and it pops up loads in telly and sitcom banter, including Only Fools and Horses.
Usage examples
"Tried to look cool on the train, tripped over my own tote bag and ate it. My mate goes, Oi you absolute plonker, you’re buying the first round."
"You absolute plonker, you've locked the keys in the car with the engine still running."
"He's a lovable plonker, turned up to the costume party a week early in a full dinosaur suit."
Other ways to say it
Editors of this term
Your vote counts
Is this real street talk or have we lost the plot? Cast your vote.